Hi.
How are you?
I am am finally getting out of my funk.
Today was OK.
I worked a short shift, so I got off work at 12:30 PM. (I started at 8:30AM). I am now off for two days and plan to spend it low key...doing some tidying, some reading, some writing, some gaming, and some walking the dog.
I hope my writing finds you well. Seriously. I hope you found something to smile about today...something to be thankful for.
I also watched some of my stream to see how I did and gosh am I every dorky, lol. Some of it is downright cringeworthy...but I think we all kind of see our selves that way when we watch video footage we are in.
I almost deleted my VODs...but no matter how terrible I am proud of myself for doing that, for putting it out there. I never thought I'd have the guts to, especially after the...drama, I guess you could say, that I went through a few years back. If you know, you know. Those were some tough times. But I encountered some good people along the way, and I'll never regret having encountered them.
If you contribute to the bad stuff in the world, I forgive you. It is the broken parts of people that hurt others on purpose/by choice. I'll always forgive you. If it wasn't on purpose/by choice, even better. I forgive you.
I never did find out who caused the issues a few years ago that hurt so much, and that's OK, I don't need to know -I still forgive them, and feel badly for them.
We can't know the motivations for why people do the things they do, not really. Sometimes we do them for other people, for work, under duress, or for more selfish reasons.
I have a theory that those who hurt others sometimes do it because they were hurting first, and it often leads to the "hurter" feeling worse than when they started. Hate begets hate, misery begets misery, and I won't contribute to it. If it's a cycle of hurter hurting others, it ends with me.
I don't want to just be the light, I want to be the love. Help heal the world.
I came out OK, I Learned a lot. I grew. And I learned to have thick skin. (FYI I am a fairly sensitive person, it doesn't take much to get to me, lol)
Today was a good day, and may tomorrow be one as well.
May we all be the love.
May we improve upon ourselves so the world is a better place tomorrow than it was today.
Love,
Sheila
